Life's Unexpected Lessons

This week, we're deviating from our usual guest interviews due to a hectic week. Sometimes, life throws unexpected challenges our way. 

One such challenge happened to me recently when my minivan was struck by a drunk driver. It could have been much worse, but we're grateful that no one was hurt. This incident reaffirmed my deep appreciation for life and the importance of living in the moment.

I've always emphasized the significance of mindfulness and death awareness, and this experience underscored their value. By practicing mindfulness and contemplating death, we can better grasp what truly matters in life.

The accident and not getting an episode done made me realize that getting stressed over minor inconveniences doesn't serve us. 

In the past, I might have been anxious about not meeting expectations, but I've learned that it's okay to let go of that stress and focus on what's genuinely important.

I will also be taking a break in December, as both my children have birthdays and we celebrate Christmas. It's a time for reflection and spending time with loved ones. But don't worry; we'll be back in January with season 2 and some exciting guests.

Thank you for your support and understanding, and remember to cherish every moment.

You can subscribe to our podcast and support us financially to keep it ad-free. Your contribution, whether big or small, is greatly appreciated. You'll find the subscription link in the show notes, and you can make a one-time contribution via Venmo.

Thank you for being part of our "Seeing Death Clearly" community, and we can't wait to reconnect with you in the upcoming episodes.

Transcript

[00:00:00] Welcome back to seeing death clearly. I'm your host, Jill McClennen, a death doula and end of life coach here on my show. I have conversations with guests that explore the topics of death, dying, grief, and life itself. My goal is to create a space where you can challenge the ideas you might already have about these subjects.

[00:00:19] I want to encourage you to open your mind and consider perspectives beyond what you may currently believe to be true. This week's episode is going to be a little bit different. I would normally be putting out an episode with a guest, but my week was a little crazy and I didn't get to edit the episode and that's okay.

[00:00:37] This is going to be a little uncomfortable for me. I don't really like just talking to myself, but sometimes we have to be a little uncomfortable. And I also did want to tell the story about what happened this week with my minivan, partially because a lot of what I talk about in my podcast with my guests.

[00:00:57] is about how short life is, and how we can't control a lot of things in life. And the gratitude that I have for every day that I'm alive has really come from a few things. My mindfulness practice, I've been practicing meditation off and on for a really long time, probably. going on 20 something years, but the last eight years or so, it's been a regular practice of mine.

[00:01:30] And then of course, my death awareness, I talk so much about death and dying and I think so much about it. And working with clients that are dying or just preparing themselves for has really gave me so much gratitude for being alive every day. It has really helped me understand what is important in life.

[00:01:54] And so on Tuesday, I was really feeling pretty good about a lot of things with my business. I'd been working really hard on a project that I completed on Tuesday. I was sitting down to talk with a client that night and, you know, I really enjoy working with my clients. And just as I had sat down to start the Zoom call, I heard this loud noise outside.

[00:02:17] And as soon as I heard it, something in me was like, somebody just totaled my van. I don't know why that was my first thought, I guess because it was actually very loud. But I walked outside and I thought, oh, well, the van looks fine. It didn't even look like it had moved. And then down at the end of my van, there was a wheel.

[00:02:34] Like not just the tire, the whole wheel with like parts of the car still attached to it laying at the end of my driveway and a little further down there was another vehicle that was pulled over and then my neighbor across the street yells to me that somebody just hit my van and I see the guy walking towards me and the first thing I said was, is, was he okay?

[00:02:55] Because that was my first thought. I wasn't worried about my van. I just wanted to make sure that he was okay and if there was anybody in his car that they were okay. And it turns out that he had been drinking and he totaled my van and his own vehicle and I wasn't mad at him. I didn't ever get angry about the situation.

[00:03:19] I even ended up actually giving him a hug because he looked so stressed and upset about the whole thing. And people that I've been telling this to are kind of saying like, Oh, you're a better person than me. Like, I would be really mad. I don't know how you weren't mad. And I'm not better than anybody else, I promise.

[00:03:37] But with the practices that I've made a conscious effort to really Think about what's important in life. I just never even got mad about it, and I'm still not mad. Days later, I'm a little stressed because we do have to get a new vehicle and the van was paid off and now I might have to have a car payment, but in the long run, it's just a vehicle.

[00:04:00] I wasn't hurt. My children weren't hurt. You know, there was nobody That got injured. And I even think of how if my van wasn't there, how potentially he would have pulled out onto this pretty busy road by us and potentially killed somebody. And I think probably all of us know somebody that has been hit by a drunk driver.

[00:04:21] And we probably almost all know somebody that has died by being hit by a drunk driver, so it happens all the time. And instead, my van was there to stop him. It was also my birthday this week, and I went into the city with my family. And we had a really lovely evening and so it just didn't have time this week to get a podcast episode edited with all of the dealing with the van and insurance and trying to get a rental and still just you know doing what I normally do as a parent and as a business owner and the podcast is It's very time consuming.

[00:05:00] I love it. I'm not complaining, but it takes a lot of time to edit it and get it out into the public.

[00:05:08] In the past, I would have really been so stressed and so anxious about not being able to get something done and feeling like I was letting people down. And, all of these stories in my head that they're not completely gone, I'm at a place now where again, I just understand what's important in life and what's not, and I'm not willing to stress and feel anxious about something that is not that important in the long run. not that the podcast isn't important. Really love creating it. I love interviewing people. I love hearing from people that listen to the podcast.

[00:05:50] And I appreciate all of that, but today just wasn't going to happen. It just wasn't getting it done this week. And I have to be okay with that. And I am okay with that. But next week I will be back with an episode

[00:06:04] and in December, I planned on taking the entire month off of the podcast. My second season will start in January, but most of December, I will not be putting out episodes. I will not be recording.

[00:06:21] Both of my children have birthdays in December. Plus, you know, we do celebrate Christmas. And I want to take that time to be with my family and to take care of myself a little bit. And relax and reflect on my year,

[00:06:37] and so I will be back in January, but I figured since I had a few moments today, , it was worth giving everybody a heads up that I will be taking the month of December off. But I'm looking forward to season two. I already have some episodes recorded because I do. tend to get very ahead of myself. It's just something again that I am working on a little bit is my,

[00:06:59] my anxiety that I'll have if I'm not ready way ahead of time for some things. But it's okay. Next season I plan on practicing what I preach, which is not worrying about the little things. It's all gonna be fine, because honestly, I'm here, I'm alive, my family and my friends are happy and healthy. Well, as happy as we can be with the state of the world today, but that's a whole nother topic.

[00:07:29] So as I wrap up this slightly awkward episode that I recorded by myself, I definitely want to remind you to just be present in your everyday life in the moment that you're in right now. And look around at your life, at your family, at your friends, and just remember that one day these things won't be there.

[00:07:50] And thank you for listening to this episode and for understanding why I could not get a normally scheduled episode out this week. But I will be back next week with the guest, Samantha Ruth. who is a psychologist, a speaker, and an author who shares her profound journey of love and loss. If you enjoyed this episode, please share it with a friend or family member who might find it interesting.

[00:08:15] Your support in spreading the podcast is greatly appreciated. Please consider subscribing on your favorite podcast platform and leaving a five star review. Your positive feedback helps recommend the podcast to others. The podcast also offers a paid subscription feature that allows you to financially support the show.

[00:08:31] Your contribution will help keep the podcast advertisement free. Whether your donation is large or small, every amount is valuable. I sincerely appreciate all of you for listening to the show and supporting me in any way you can. You can find a link in the show notes to subscribe to the paid monthly subscription, as well as a link to my Venmo if you prefer to make a one time contribution.

[00:08:51] Thank you and I look forward to seeing you in next week's episode of seeing death clearly.